JUST A FEW ONE LINER JOKES.....:) ENJOYYYYY

Two snowmen are standing in a field. One says to the other : "Funny, I smell carrots too".

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
el-if-i-no

Two peanuts walk into a bar.
One was a salted.

Once upon a time there were two muffins in the microwave. Suddenly, on of the muffins says:
"Man it's hot in here!!!!"
The other muffin exclaims,
"Look a talking muffin!!!!"

A Horse goes into a bar and the bartender says
"Hey buddy, Why the Long Face"

Q. Where do you find a one legged dog?
A. Where you left it.

Q. What's pink and fluffy
A. Pink fluff

Q. What's blue and fluffy
A. Pink fluff holding it's breath

What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud

What do you call a camal with 3 humps?
Humphreys

What do cows do for entertainment?
They rent moovies !

What do you call a fish with no eye ?
FSH !

What do you call a deer with no eyes ?
I have no I-Deer

What is a dogs favourite school subject?
"Dog-Ruff-E "

Why are there no asprins in the jungle?
Because the Parots-ate-em-all

Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested?
He was charged with battery

INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES DAY :)

YOU KNOW WHEN YOU HAVE THEM DAYS, WHERE YOU JUST DON'T FEEL UP TO GOING TO SCHOOL, OR TO WORK AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHY??
WELL SOMETIMES IT IS DUE TO A LACK OF MOTIVATION...I KNOW THAT EVERYONE NEEDS A PUSH AT TIMES AND JUST A FEW WORDS CAN HELP INSPIRE YOU TO BREAKTHROUGH THE DAY.

SO HERE ARE A FEW QUOTES FROM FAMOUS AND NONFAMOUS PEOPLE THAT NOT ONLY MAKE YOU THINK BUT MAKE YOU SMILE :)

Try not to become a man of success but a man of value.
Albert Einstein

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.
Henry David Thoreau

Inspiration and genius--one and the same.
Victor Hugo

To find what you seek in the road of life,
the best proverb of all is that which says:
"Leave no stone unturned."
Edward Bulwer Lytton

If you would create something,
you must be something.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Every artist was first an amateur.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

The more difficulties one has to encounter, within and without, the more significant and the higher in inspiration his life will be.
Horace Bushnell

Life has no smooth road for any of us; and in the bracing atmosphere of a high aim the very roughness stimulates the climber to steadier steps, till the legend, over steep ways to the stars, fulfills itself.
W. C. Doane

Experience is the child of thought, and thought is the child of action.
Benjamin Disraeli

Do we not all agree to call rapid thought and noble impulse by the name of inspiration?
George Eliot

No great man ever complains of want of opportunities.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Men do less than they ought,
unless they do all they can.
Thomas Carlyle

Let thy words be few.
Ecclesiastes 5:2

Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.
Leon J. Suenes

The power of imagination makes us infinite.
John Muir

First say to yourself what you would be;
and then do what you have to do.
Epictetus